I just realized..

It's February! The month of love! The month that makes single people feel like crap! I'm using too much exclamation points! But who cares! It's fun!

Ahem. Anyway. As I said, it's the month of love. (That word makes me cringe for some reason.) For TLE this quarter, we're studying boy-girl relationships. And I'm not kidding. We have a whole chapter in our book that's dedicated to love, relationships, dating, and parenting (WTF). (Yes, parenting. I guess they're expecting us to get pregnant the moment we graduate from high school.) The book defined love. And we're probably expected to memorize the definitions for the exams. (Yes, they're going to give us an exam on love. And it's going to be graded.)

Our teacher made a special true or false "Test for Young Lovers" that would make anyone taking it go all "what the fuck is this shit" in his/her mind. Most of the questions are opinion-based but, given my past experiences with TLE tests, I expect that there would be right and wrong opinions. (Yes, our teacher is just that stupid.)

Premarital sex is acceptable if the lovers really do care for each other.
Love cannot be studied because it focuses more on emotions rather than skills.


THEN WHAT IS YOUR POINT IN TEACHING US ABOUT LOVE THEN?

I literally starting banging my head on my desk after the third question.

But the stupidity does not stop there. She required us to make a list of qualities boys like in girls and vice-versa. How the heck are we supposed to know what boys like in girls? We barely get to interact with the male population. And when we were done with the qualities girls found attractive in guys, she asked us: "Do you think that is true love?" ._.

WE ARE MOTHERFRIGGIN TEENAGERS, WOMAN. WE DO NOT THINK ABOUT TRUE LOVE AT THIS AGE.


But as usual, I have no idea where I'm going with this post so I'll just tell you about our homework.

We were supposed to give a list of qualities we found attractive in guys. She told us to be as specific as we could. We could even include a photo. As usual, I didn't take it seriously and used my mathletic hunky dude's photo and gave very specific details because that's what she asked for.

My homework:

WANT TO BE MY (BOY)FRIEND?(Application form at the back)
(back part)
- must have catapultic (made it up) upper body strength
- must be able to throw a ball 144 ft up in the air
- must have a fake tan
- must have blond hair with superhuman powers
- must have a fan club
- must own a blimp
- must know the first thirty digits of pi
- must know how to make pie
- must be able to speak Russian
- must be able to speak Japanese
- must be able to understand Lady Rainicorn
- must be able to speak English 
- must be able to speak English with a British accent
- not gay
- not freaked out by the fact that I have a checklist for this thing

* Apply only if all boxes have been checked. If not, then GTFO and don't waste my time.

Mmm. Schmexy.

She had me explain my homework in front of the class, which was humiliating. Then when I finished, she asked me what "GTFO" meant. So I told her it meant Great The French Onion. Sucker believed me.



Lesson learned: A lot of people in my class don't watch Adventure Time.